I went Christmas shopping today and to be honest it was not an easy day. I put on a brave face for Samantha and the kids as they done deserve to see me down. I went to find Samantha some Christmas presents and it was not an easy task to be honest. All I saw was stuff that you would have liked. Lots of dogs and panda stuff. I had to go into the toilet to have a little cry. This is the 2nd Christmas without you but it’s been harder than last year . I suppose last year I did most of my shopping online and this year just brought back all those Christmas we spent together.